Farm Girl

Creating my happy life on the other side of fear.

Sunday, 18 June 2017

The cure for everything



What do you do when your MIL tells you, in quick succession, that 
a) your corgi is too fat, and that "she won't get old when you keep feeding her like that", and
b) your hips got bigger (said to Rich, not me: "Did she gain weight? Her hips look bigger.", which, in her dialect, is phrased as "Did it gain weight? The hips look bigger.").

The old me would have been deeply offended and agonized about her comments for weeks.
The new me, fortunately, has found a much better way of dealing with it: Shrug it off. 
In a life that feels so good and is so fulfilling, her words are nothing but a little blip. Thoughtless and slightly insulting, but nothing to get worked up about. 
Whenever it gets too MIL-ly in the house, I take the dogs and go for a walk. Nature's beauty is so soothing, it cures everything!

Even fat-shaming my girl and my nice, womanly hips.  


Have a wonderful Sunday! Don't let anybody dull your sparkle. 
We are fabulous!

xoxo Miriam



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Wednesday, 14 June 2017

Evenings in Cowboy-land


I come home from work just before 4:00pm.
Pulling in, I see 4 guys perched on their tailgates, cold cans of beer in their hands, country music playing.
"Miriam! You're home! Do you want one?" They call, beckoning me over. I accept it gratefully.
They've been working on our fences all day, starting at 7am. They work hard, but they also know how to enjoy themselves. All their lunch boxes contain a few cans of beer, and their supply of jokes is just as well stocked.

"Did you know that Willie Nelson died?"
We're shocked. "What? Really??"
"Yes, he was playing on the road again."

Yes, I fell for it. (In my defence, so did Rich. Willie is getting up there!)
The good news is: Willie is still alive and well, and coming to our town this summer!

We sit on the tailgates, sipping beer, listening to music, and being entertained by our resident comedian. He does a killer Sean Connery!
I love these guys.

Later, I go over to our neighbour's place, to look after their animals. They're away working, and I'm in charge of their cats and temporary dog Rudi. You know that I have no special feelings towards cats, but Rudi is sweet!
Here he is:

He gets along well with the corgi, which is fortunate, because if he wouldn't, we would have a serious problem. But then again, who doesn't get along with the corgi? She has that special gift of being liked by all. 

Another night, we go for a little stroll on the ranch with mother-in-law, who is currently visiting us.

Our destination? The goat pen!
Keeping a safe distance

The goats are the funniest little creatures you can imagine, I love them! I'm teaching them to do yoga with me, one bribe at a time. The most promising one is Adele:
She's the brown one on the left: One more hop, and she'll be up there. 


Evenings are magical at this time of year. 

xoxo Miriam



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Monday, 5 June 2017

The reason why



There are the rare moments when everything is easy and crystal clear. 
You are in love, and it was so difficult and controversial in the beginning, that you wanted to write it all down. Not only to preserve the memory for yourself, but also to encourage others who are facing tough decisions, disapproval, and doubt. Oh god, the doubt. I could write an entire book just on that. 

You want to show them that, even though it's so fucking hard at times, it's worth it a million times over. The hardship you face right now, and that may seem insurmountable, will be nothing but a teeny, tiny speck on the vast windshield of your life. It will be nothing but a blip. An amusing anecdote to laugh about later over shared glasses of wine. 

But so many of us never make it past the initial hurdles. 
There is so much uncertainty. 
So many reasons not to go for it.
There is social pressure. 
Family obligations. 
Parental expectation. 
Moral burdens, no matter whether you are religious or not - you will be hit with them (by people just as non-religious as you are), and it will affect you, despite your best efforts. 
Because we grew up with these rules, these expectations to not be like one of them - the outsiders, rebels, the people with scandals that are being talked about by people who play by the rules. 
And honestly, after you've passed the brief, yet intense phase of being a rebellious teenager (and you were only rebellious because, despite your best efforts, you never managed to fit in), all you ever wanted was a good, quiet life. A life of peace, no confrontations, happiness, and universal approval. 
Yet, despite your best efforts, you are still that awkward teenager who simply can't fit in. 
How annoying is that?!?

There is your desire for approval by your peers. By society, parents, church, the whole universe. 

But there is also your heart. And your soul. And they are telling you something with such startling clarity, that you can't ignore it. 
They're telling you that you have an enormous, once-in-a-lifetime chance of happiness
You have the chance of a love beyond your wildest dreams. It's too new, too fragile, too unknown to be understood by your much slower mind. But your heart and soul already know: This.Is.It. 

If you have never been sure about anything,  but you are sure about that? 
If, despite the doubts, and all the well-meaning, rational, smart advice people are giving you - you know that, if you don't do this, you will regret it for the rest of your life - how would you decide?
Head over heart?
Heart over head?

I made my decision. 
We both did. 

It wasn't much liked in the beginning. Most people thought we lost our minds. We were judged and pronounced guilty. 
And we struggled with that. 

But still, a force stronger than all the outside forces pulled us towards each other: Love

The power of love is greater than anything else. 
We couldn't help but comply to it, and we are so grateful for it every single day. 

That's why I wrote down our story. 
Because it's the best thing that ever happened to us. 

And I don't want you to miss out on a love like that, just because it doesn't fit society's expectations. 
Or your parent's plans for you. 
Or the ancient rules written by a church you may not even believe in. 

It may be the bravest thing I ever did - and I wanted to document that. 

With my upcoming book, I have done just that. 

Now, it's your turn. Stop listening to your critics, and start listening to your heart. 

It won't lead you astray. 

xoxo Miriam


P.S. To read the first chapter of my book, you can sign up here.  

P.P.S. I will keep you posted about more details about the book! Obviously. I mean, without you? I would have never written it. Thank you, thank you, thank you!!



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