Thursday, 27 September 2018

A community of misfits

I walk past garden gnomes who cheekily moon me. Across from them is a "Bat Box", a wooden box hung up for bats to sleep in with a happy bat painted on the front.
One house has a cornfield in its small front yard. It's only about 30 stalks in total, but it's a real tiny cornfield in the midst of a residential neighborhood.  
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Monday, 24 September 2018

Coming home to myself

I'm re-discovering the meaning of slowing down. This weekend was a truly slow one, with basically nothing happening, but it was deeply satisfying and relaxing. I'm finally coming home to myself. 
Rich didn't come to visit me this weekend because he had a few other things going on, and even though I missed him, I loved spending all this time just with Lily, myself, and my room mate. 
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Saturday, 22 September 2018

I'm done fitting in, and so should you

When we are young, all we want is to fit in. It's a basic human instinct to blend in instead of standing out, because it's safer. In the animal kingdom, sticking out can lead to being eaten - in the human world, it can lead to being made fun of, bullied, or ignored. 
I was no different. All my life, my goal was to fit in. I wanted to be like everybody else around me, because I always felt just a little different - and there is nothing worse for a kid than to feel like you don't belong. So I did what all shy kids do: I observed the behavior of the people I wanted to be friends with, and tried to imitate them. 
I wasn't very good at it. I'm a terrible actress and an even worse liar, and faking to like something that I didn't was so much work, I wondered if it was worth it. However, the next period of loneliness would always be waiting around the corner, and when I was lonely enough I was once again willing to do almost anything to have friends. 
What I didn't know then was that fitting in and belonging are not the same thing at all. In fact, they are completely different from each other. 
When you try to fit in, you adjust your behavior, your likes and dislikes, the way you dress and how you act according to your environment. In short: you try to be someone you are not. Belonging is the complete opposite. It means being 100% yourself and finding a place in the world that feels like home. It's finding people you can be yourself with. 
Fitting in is about how to fit in; belonging is about where you fit in. 
You can't force belonging. It has to happen organically. If you feel like you don't belong, here is what you can do: get to know yourself. We are surrounded by so much noise, so many opinions and outside influences that it can be hard to separate our own thoughts from the ones of others. It's easy to get confused about our own beliefs and values. Getting to know who we are takes time, self-reflection and some serious soul searching. But it's essential that we do that, because if we don't know who we are, how can we belong?
Get to know you. Fall in love with who you are. The happier you are with yourself, the more you will attract other people. We are all drawn to people who radiate contentment, peace and serenity. The best part? Once you find happiness in yourself, your desire to fit in will seize to exist. You simply won't have that need anymore.
I believe that being by yourself is much better and healthier than being with the wrong people. Nothing makes you feel lonelier than being with "friends" you don't belong to. 
Trying to fit in will keep you small - being proudly yourself and blazing your own trail will set you free!


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Friday, 21 September 2018

10 things I'm loving right now

Fall is in full swing around here, and I'm loving it! As much as I enjoy summer, this one was a bit of a weird one for me, and I'm really grateful for the fresh start a new season brings. Our temperature has cooled off significantly, and I'm all all about the coziness these days!
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Tuesday, 11 September 2018

Keep at it

I got it all wrong. 
I thought that achieving the goal was the key to the happily ever after. 
I thought that after hustling and working hard and hustling some more, getting some rest and relaxation would be the sweetest feeling in the world. 
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Wednesday, 5 September 2018

She Shed tour!

I'm so excited to finally share a few photos of my beautiful She Shed with you guys! 
Almost a year ago I announced that I convinced Rich to build me my own little cabin. I envisioned it to be a mix between a tiny house, Canadian lake cabin, and whimsical fairy house. The end result is a collaboration between Rich's, the carpenters', and my vision, and it far surpasses all my expectations!
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Tuesday, 4 September 2018

Our Enneagram types

Have you guys ever done an Enneagram Test? I never have, until today, and I'm blown away by the results! They are really accurate, you guys. I don't know anything about the science or the background of the test, because I literally stumbled over it this morning while doing a good old-fashioned stalking of old Sister Style posts from A Beautiful Mess. 
I always loved their Sister Style series, and I get nostalgic when the seasons change, thus the walk down their memory lane. In one of their posts Elsie mentions her Enneagram type (she's a type 7), and since I had nothing better to do this morning, I decided to do an Enneagram test for me and Rich
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