This month marks 18 years since Rich and I met each other. 18 years! It's crazy.
I always get sentimental this time of year, because that August in 2002 changed my entire life.
So when oNecklace contacted me for another collaboration I knew right away that I wanted to find a piece of jewelry that would celebrate our relationship.
At first I was thinking of something with either his name or our initials on it. oNecklace has a lot of awesome engraved necklaces, and I almost chose this simple disk necklace with his initial on it. We don't know the exact date we met, so we arbitrarily chose August 15, which is close enough. You know how it is on vacation, it's easy to lose track of time, and we were busy falling in love ❤
But when I saw this pretty and delicate moon and star necklace, I knew that it was an even better fit.
We had our first night together in a field under the stars. I love looking up at the stars at night, because they are so much brighter here than they were in our old home. On top of that, as a healthcare worker I like any moon that's not full, because it means that most of the crazies are staying home until the next full moon.
One of the many things we figured our over the years to make our relationship successful was for me to stop expecting gifts from him for every birthday, anniversary, and Christmas. Rich only gives a gift when he sees something that he thinks I'll love. He can't do it on command, and the few times I gilt-tripped him into it the gifts were quite sad.
But he's also given me some amazing things over the years: a surprise box of tulips he secretly grew in the basement; an inside dog (Lily); my first laptop, despite me telling him before that I didn't need one because we had a desktop computer (I was SO wrong); a field of sunflowers; my first Dyson.
But when it comes to jewelry, I mostly buy it myself and we are both happy. The great thing about living your own life and making your own money is that you can make your own rules; so do what makes you happy, and not what society tells you to do.
My husband is not a great "on demand" gift giver either. At wedding showers when they ask the guests to give the bride advice, I always say, "Give yourself special gifts, don't wait for your husband to do it and you both will be much happier!" We have been married 45 happy years!
ReplyDeleteThat's such great and IMPORTANT advice!
DeleteIt took me an insane amount of time to learn that our relationship wasn't any less valid just because we do some things differently from what you are taught is "normal".
I went through a lot of unnecessary angst and heartache just because I thought we should do things the way I thought everybody else did (even though they don't. I know that now - didn't know it then).
Being more honest with each other will avoid years of heartache and self-doubt!