Sunday 9 December 2018

39 Life Lessons that will make you feel better about yourself

I celebrated my 39th birthday a few days ago (thanks for all the birthday wishes, you guys are awesome!), and as per usual, it made me stop and reflect on my life so far. With the end of the year approaching the air is ripe with reflecting vibes, and I loved sitting down and thinking of everything I have learnt about life thus far. 
Here it is:

1. Nobody knows what they are doing. No matter how much it seems that someone has their shit together, trust me on this: they don't. They are just really good at faking it. 
2. You have time. You don't have to have reached your career goals or bought your dream home or have 2.5 children at a certain age. Do it at your own speed.
3. You are allowed to change your goals. You always thought you wanted to have a high-powered career but actually, you're happy to keep working at the book store you love? That's okay! You can change your goals. In fact, they will change, because as we get older our priorities shift and so do our dreams. 
4. We have way less control over life than we think we do. Accept it and go with the flow.  
5. You are responsible for your own happiness, nobody else. Yes, that includes your spouse. 
6. Laugh lots. Especially about yourself!
7. The world is beautiful. Look around you and enjoy it!
8. Make it your goal to find joy every day. 
9. You don't owe the world an explanation. Do your thing and stop apologizing!
10. Other people's opinion about you has nothing to do with you. 

11. Some people are assholes, and there is nothing you can do about it.
12. Nothing is sexier than a woman - or man - comfortable in their own skin. Start loving yours!
13. Stop counting calories. Diets were invited as marketing tools to make us feel horrible about ourselves so we start buying stuff to make us feel better (Spanx, exercise equipment, diet shakes, pills, workout videos, diet books, gym memberships, etc). Don't play their game! Listen to your body, eat what you want, and break free from the manipulation of the diet industry. 
14. Find out what you love, and do it lots
15. Everybody is scared. If you really want something, learn to do it despite the fear.
16. Books are our best friends and greatest adventures. There is a book out there for every life situation. 
17. Own your story. Your past is what made you into the person you are today. Don't be ashamed of it!
18. Depression lies. Don't believe her when she tells you that you are unworthy. You are worthy. 
19. Unfollow whoever makes you feel bad. Life's too short for humble-braggers, show-offs and people acting superior to others.
20. Not all friendships last forever, and that's okay. Some friends are only supposed to stay for a season in your life. 

21. Cats are kinda wonderful. As a die-hard dog lover, it took me 39 years to learn that truth. Stay open to new possibilities!
22. It's never too late to start over. New job, new town, new relationship - if it feels right, go for it!
23. Wear whatever makes you feel good. Feel free to ignore so-called "fashion rules"!
24. You are doing better than you think you are. Focus on everything you have achieved, instead of what you haven't (yet). 
25. Tears are not a weakness. They cleanse you and make you feel better. 
26. There is strength in vulnerability. Don't hide what makes you feel vulnerable - embrace it. You won't experience true love or real growth without being vulnerable, and if you don't then you won't experience real joy. 
27. Relationships should make you feel better, not worse. If they don't, it's time to get out. That applies to friends, significant others - and yes, family members. 
28. Your worth is not measured by your productivity. You don't have to earn your worthiness; it's your inherent right. 
29. Expectations can create heartbreak. Stop expecting too much from life and from others, and start practicing gratitude for what you have instead. 
30. Be kind, always. 

31. Boundaries, man - set them. Learn your limitations, and don't push yourself too hard. Don't let others stomp all over you, and don't try to do it all. 
32. Learn to say no. To parties you don't want to go to, people you don't want in your life, to obligations you don't want to have or drama you're sick of.   
33. Learn to say yes. To new opportunities, new adventures, a second slice of birthday cake, and to love and laughter and friendship.
34. Becoming yourself is about returning to the person you always were. It's about undoing all the attempts of being someone we thought we are supposed to be and learning to love our true selves. 
35. Sometimes, staying in bed all day is the best. Or necessary. It's okay if you want to hide from the world for a while. The world will still be there when you're ready to rejoin it.
36. Find a hobby and do it just for the fun of it. Not everything needs to turn into a side hustle, a possible future career or a second income. Do something just because you enjoy it!
37. Failure is not half as bad as you think it is. The fear of failure is worse than failure itself. Everybody fails all the time, it's how we learn and evolve! Look at it as a growing tool, and remember that the only people who rarely fail are the ones who are too scared to try something new. 
38. You don't have to make sense to other people. Make sense to you, that's all that counts.
39. Always pee before you leave the house. Few things in life are less comfortable than a full bladder, and a burst bladder can kill you.* 

*That's what a paramedic once told me.

What are some life lessons you have learnt?

xoxo Miriam



  1. happy birthday! here's to 39 more, at a minimum

  2. So true as I'm beginning to understand life and its compendium of tricks. Belated happy birthday and keep showing us the light! Garry xxx

  3. I loved your post, Going thru a rough time and it got me to thinking. Thanks for putting it on your blog.


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