Friday 6 September 2013

The scariest (and best!) decision of my life

Blogtember topic of the day: A story about a time you were very afraid.

I have been afraid many times in my life. Haven't we all? As soon as you leave the safe haven of childhood (and even that's scary - remember those monsters under the bed??), a lot of stuff becomes frightening. Choosing your future career, your mate, your path in life... all these are scary decisions we have to make in life.

But there is one particular event that topped them all. I was sick-to-my-stomach, vomiting, crying, I-wanna-die afraid.

It was the fall of 2002. At that time I lived in Freising, a small town close to Munich, where I went to college to study Forestry. (That never worked out - more about it here).  

On that particular Friday I was on my way to my parent's house, a 3-hour drive away. That drive is edged into my memory as one of the worst drives ever. Not because of road conditions, almost-collisions or anything car-related - but because I was terrified. You see, I had to tell my parents something. Something that I knew they wouldn't like. Not one bit!
I knew they would be shocked, probably disappointed (is there anything worse than disappointing your parents?), and there might be yelling.
Those 3 hours were horrible. I quietly sobbed for the most part. Twice I had to stop to pee, a number 2 (being "scared shitless" is not just an expression), and to throw up.
I was shaking. I wanted that drive to never end but finally be over at the same time. Definitely one of the scariest times of my life.

What was I gonna tell my parents you may wonder?
Well, at 22 years of age I was about to inform them that I was going to quit my studies, move 8,000 kilometers away to a different country to live with a man whom I had known for less than a month.
A man who was not only not divorced yet, but also had children. Four of them!

Isn't that just what every parent wants to hear from their child?
Needless to say, they did not like it one bit. They were disappointed. And worried (probably about the state of my mental health).

But in the end, they couldn't stop me, and they gave me a new suitcase for Christmas and drove me to the airport on January 10, 2003. They told me I can come home any time, and wished me the best.
I will never forget how supportive they were despite their (very understandable) misgivings.
Thank you from the bottom of my heart mom and dad!

The rest is history. Our experiment worked out, and it was all for the best.

But I will never forget that drive, and the pure terror I felt.



  1. oh that must've been so scary! are they happy about it now? :)

  2. O goodness that gave me goosebumps, I remember calling my mom and telling her I was moving to Sweden to be with a guy I knew a month as well it all worked out as well but man was that scary!

    1. No way!! We are both crazy (in love) girls!
      You gotta follow your heart. I'm glad it worked out for you, too!


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