Tuesday 25 November 2014

How to live a happy life



Dear humans,
today we need to talk about happiness. My mom talks about it a lot, and has mentioned to me that it is hard for humans to find lasting happiness.

That baffled me.

How can it be hard? It is the easiest thing in the world! Since you seem to need some guidance, I am here to save the day.

So listen up, two-legs, and follow my lead. I know my mom does every day on our walks, and she seems pretty happy!

This brings me to my first point: Walks.
I love walks. Walking makes me poop. Sometimes only once, but most of the time twice! Pooping is so much fun, right? Makes you feel light and free afterwards. Who can be unhappy when they have just pooped?
But I have to admit, I am worried about my mom's digestive system. She walks with me every day, yet she has never even pooped once! She must be one plugged-up lady. I admire her good humour - I couldn't be as cheerful in her position!

Play.
I play every day with my friends Phoebe, Bear and Snow. I love them! It's okay being in the house and all, but a girl's gotta run wild and free, ya know?
My mom sometimes doesn't want to let me out, but I have my routine:
Run up and down the stairs.
Scratch on the door.
Give her "the look". (Big brown eyes, fixated on her without blinking. Works like a charm.)
Chew on the couch.

That last one is my last resort, only to be employed if all else has failed. Dad is getting pretty mad about the couch by now, and he is much stricter than mom...

But we all need to hang with our friends, am I right? Of course I am.

Demand attention.
You get used to a certain lifestyle: Massages, kisses, belly rubs around the clock. In the beginning I was a bit bewildered, but I quickly learnt that this is how it's supposed to be. So when, without warning, the attention ceases, a girl has to take action. My ears don't stroke themselves, now do they?
Whenever I feel neglected, I have my ways to demand what is rightfully mine:
I jump on laps.
I wag my little tail like it's nobody's business.
I look adoringly in human's eyes.
When I have enough, I jump off and return to my bone.

Everything is like it should be.


Do what you like. 
I like jumping on tables. Why wouldn't I? The view is fantastic, if I'm lucky there is some food or at least water, and if not, so far I have always found something interesting to chew on.
But apparently, it's "bad". Whatever that means. If that's what bad feels like, I don't want to be good!
However, one recent comment has concerned me deeply. I was called - (I shudder just thinking about it) - "cat-like". What does that mean? I haven't met cats yet, but my friend Snow hates them. So I do, too, out of solidarity. Which means, that comment is disturbing. Will I have to mend my ways, for the sake of not being cat-like any more? Decisions, decisions.

Treats.
I have a savoury tooth, I'm not gonna lie. Every time I get a treat, the heavens open up and the angels are singing. I love duck! And chicken, beef, and turkey. I think that's all the meats I have eaten so far,and I love them all.
My friends have tried rabbit and rat, and apparently, rabbit is delicious! Rats not so much, I think I will pass.

So you see? Being happy is easy. You're welcome!



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3 comments

  1. Such a cute Corgi! And my dog's name is Lily too! :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Oh Lily, it's the best kind of compliment to be called cat-like. All dogs secretly wish they were cats.... Think about it - perhaps Snow doth protest too much?

    :)

    I think Kiki and Lily would agree about how a good poop makes them feel light and free. Sometimes after Kiki leaves the litter box she goes tearing around the house in full sprint mode.

    ReplyDelete
  3. haha, i love the lily posts! life can be that simple sometimes.

    ReplyDelete

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